I believe I may have already mentioned in some of my journals how much of a d-bag my father is, but I'll highlight on some of his recent actions later on. As most you probably know (if my memory isn't totally whacked up I made some journals on this topic), I have been struggling with temps in my wooden enclosures. I'm happy to say I've pretty much got everything taken care of now. The top enclosure maintains 90F temps as long as the wood stove is burning, or unless there's a particularly cold night. 20F below nights are becoming common now, even as we still have 60F days....The bottom enclosure is a whole different story. The first several days I was able to maintain both temps at 90F like a dream, but when I had to mix water into the bottom enclosure's bedding everything went downhill. Since then, I have not been able to get the temp above 87F and it's very infrequent I get it above 85F. So, I went through a process where I slowly turn up the Day Time Temp until it reaches 90F. When that failed (for the first time), I waited a few days to see if the wet bedding was just taking awhile to warm up. Even when it came time to wet the bedding again, it got to 87F but no higher. Since Cloud just went into shed, I decided this could not do and I switched the snakes around. Bud is in the bottom one and Cloud is in the top one. Bud has already been introduced to Cloud without any ill effects, so I knew they were both clean. Neither of them are showing any signs of being bothered (well, Cloud is in shed but I don't he'd care either way) by each other's scents, which should fade pretty quickly if they haven't already. Anyway, once I put the second CHE in place and covered the top enclosure's doors with towels my dad kind of just popped a cork. Apparently it's too much work for him for me to install heating and insulate the doors so he basically told me to get the snakes out (I'm not even using the space heater anymore so he has no reason to care). He's been threatening for awhile, but he was being somewhat serious this time. So, I asked if I could go ahead and move the snake's to my mom's friend's. Everyone was ok with that.
I was supposed to get them over there Tuesday, but the guy's truck was overheating. I also decided I was going to go ahead and go with them. 1) If the snakes go, I go and 2) I'm really sick of my dad. I've already gotten all of my stuff packed up and ready to go, and I'm just waiting for the truck to be fixed. Hopefully everything should be done over this weekend, or in the next week at the very least.
My dad honestly thinks that the snakes will be perfectly fine if their cages get below 70F, even if it's for an extended period of time. When I tell him that they can't survive (or at least stay healthy) out of their temp range, he responds by saying there's no way they're that delicate or they would have died out long ago. If they were that delicate then they deserve to die. That's how he thinks: if just the bare minimum (in the snakes' case: heat lamp, food, and water) then they are weak and they don't deserve to live. He doesn't realize that they're adapted for a certain way of life, and they don't die because they're weak. In the wild they can find warmer or cooler spots, more or less humidity, they estivate or hibernate to escape extreme conditions. Even in the wild they need to have that certain range. Some species are more sensitive than others and some are very hardy, but they still need that range to thrive. In captivity, it is the owner's job to provide that for them. As my Bio teacher says: "It's not survival of the fittest, it's survival of the best adapted (in a certain environment)." He was perfectly fine with me having snakes until I started trying to tell him what's actually involved in their care. My snakes are now too much work for him, despite the fact he has no responsibility for them. He built the enclosures, but he offered to do it and now that they're completed he doesn't have anything to do with them. He doesn't feed or water them, he doesn't mix the bedding, he didn't install either of the CHE's, and he didn't cover the doors and yet he's complaining about how much work they are? Can you say tyrannical?
That way of thinking extends into his care of children. He thinks that to take care of a child you just need to give them food and shelter. Unfortunately that's not the way it goes. You have to be supportive, you can't constantly emotionally abuse your children, and not care about them and then expect that throwing nice stuff at them will make everything better. The one time I got a C he responded by saying that I'll never be able to do anything than flip hamburgers at McDonald's, I guess in an attempt to make me feel ashamed and do better next time. For a while there he was being the stereotypical "Asian dad" until he realized I didn't really care. The next math after that I proceeded to get a D. It obviously worked (round of applause anyone for his success?). If I get a pain or I'm sore he thinks I'm pretending and gets pissed off at me. A few months ago I went to the ER because of bronchospasm. He literally thought I was making the whole thing up for attention (he obviously doesn't know me very well...). Even though the doctor said to avoid cigarette smoke, he continued to smoke in the house. In fact he did it more often and made sure to be as close to me as he could so I was forced to leave the house just to get away from it. Last winter he knew I was worried about the snakes having RI's (which I know honestly think their wheezing was just being out of breath since they literally show no other signs of illness and they always come clean at the vet's), so he would open all of the windows so my room would be cold. For my 17th birthday he got me an iPod and I don't remember what I did but it was probably not doing a chore right or not as quick as he liked, but he proceeded to wave it in my face saying, "See this? See this? This is what you WOULD have gotten for your birthday." I was already upset from what he did earlier, but I wasn't particularly made upset by this so I ended up getting it anyway since he didn't get the satisfaction of my anguish. Lately, he's gotten this idea in his head that my brother is lying about what he's doing after school every day. According to him: Going to band practice? No! Lying to stay after school to hang out with friends. Going to Anime Club? No! Lying to stay after school to hang out with friends. Going to the college to start the process of going to college? No! Lying to stay after school to hang out with friends. The thing is, I've been picking him up and he is doing exactly what he's saying he's doing. When I told him that I PHYSICALLY go to some of the Anime Club meetings he let up on that. I asked him why he would be lying if he was just hanging out with friends he said, "I don't know. He's just a habitual liar. It's what he does." He thinks this literally with no evidence or even a reason to think it in the first place. There's hundreds of things I could say, but I believe this is sufficient to show why I really really don't like my father.
It doesn't help that he's been watching all of these radical conspiracy theory shows lately, which could possibly be playing a role in him deciding to shut off the internet. He said he couldn't afford it, but I offered to pay the whole bill ($40). He just ignored me and returned the modem anyway. Now I get to waste gas to come out to my mothers (yay!!!). He may also be showing the first signs of dementia/Alzheimer's because he's been acting far worse than usual the past year or so. He has begun forgetting some things easily (but knowing him he could also be doing that on purpose just to make us more miserable), but he hasn't started forgetting what he's doing or anything.